Where I Stand

Dear Not There Anymore,

You said I should delete all our pictures together, I tried.
You said I should blur all our memories together, I tried.
I wish it was so easy to undo a phase of life. And it was not, but still I tried.
I wish I could remove all frames of situations that had us smiling together. It wasnโ€™t easy, but still, I tried.
You asked me to block you from all ways of access,I tried.
You asked me to disconnect from you, by all means, I tried.
Not because I hated all of those in my thoughts, but because it was you who said it.
A lot many things I wished hoping you would understand on your own. So, here I never tried.
I wish I could hide those pretty dresses you gifted me on random days.
In fact, that one in blue if you recall, I recently wore it for my office function.
I wish I could do away with those heels you bought as we roamed on the crowded streets of the city.
I wish I could do away with those pretty shades of red lipstick you gifted me just when I said I loved that colour.
I wish I could give away that first Branded handbag I got from you when you heard I got a job through college placements.
I wish I could break those sun glasses which you quietly presented me the first time we met after a month long relationship.
I wish I could change my house where I dreamed of you being treated so well every time you returned home.
I wish I could erase those places on the map that we explored together on your bike.
I wish I could delete a lot more than just pictures and words, I wish I could erase them all alone.
I wish my passwords didn’t have your name and I wish I could still change them all.
I wish my phone was not gifted by you and so, I wish I could forget this all. I wish I could forget this all.
But, See where I stand; today I am writing it all.

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